someone

Dear someone,

Sometimes you need to step back and take a long, good look at yourself. This also involves looking at how people view you as well. It's a scary prospect, I know, but it's sometimes really necessary. The time is here for you, my dear. Walk over to that mirror and listen to me.

There you are, raw, and beautiful. No, it's no the conventional beauty that you've always longed for, it's not the kind of beauty that stops men in their tracks or that belongs on the cover of a magazine. That kind of beauty is one-dimensional and fades with time and passing fads. Look at yourself and look into yourself. You are the same kind of person you praise others for being. You are kind. You are thoughtful. You are generous. You will do practically anything to make someone smile.

People see this in you; why can't you? You don't have to look like Katie Holmes or Jennifer Love Hewitt to be beautiful. Your actions often determine your beauty. I've seen you spend your money on an object that is insignificant to you but will make someone else's day. I've heard you tell people exactly why you love them and why you think they are beautiful. And I've heard you cut off the same people when they try to tell you something about yourself. Why won't you listen? I have a hard time believing that you really feel like you aren't worth anything. I have a hard time believing that you don't know you're a good person, that somewhere in there, you don't recognise that you're someone who is worth receiving everything you give out.

I've seen you surround yourself with people who aren't good for you before, a very long time ago. I've seen your mental and physical health decline because of the psychic vampires and selfish trolls you've let into your life. I know you struggle with letting people go because you want to believe that your gut instinct is wrong, that these people really are good deep down. I know that you struggle with yourself after you turn these people out of your life as well. I know you question your judgement of people and I know you question yourself; that maybe it was just you, not these people. It would be easier if it were you. I understand that. I know that you feel if it was you, you could change and make everything better. It's easier to change yourself than to change others. I know you want to protect everyone else, even if it's at the expense of yourself. But you can't do that, and it's time to recognise that sometimes, you need to save yourself too.

Save yourself someone.

Ask for help when you need it. Take advice. Listen to the people you love. If someone tells you your eyes are beautiful, listen and accept that your eyes are beautiful. Maybe you don't think they are, but your eyes are beautiful to someone and you shouldn't discount that opinion because you don't feel you're worthy of compliments. You can't be perfect. No one can. You've told at least one of your friends this. It applies to you as well.

You are talented. You are funny. You are worthy and you are loved. And yes, you are beautiful. You are beautiful even if you don't see it yourself. You are. Listen to the people you love. Stop putting yourself down. Stop discounting what people have to say about you because it makes you uncomfortable. Stop not believing in yourself. Take some of your own advice. Get off your ass and take the world by storm!

Love,

fauzi