Rabmlings of a mute

I know I'm a gaijin to some people they see me. From my appearance to my my languages, they don't see me as a true Penangites. But still, I don't go out the causing a riot or intensionally to make piss you of just because I'm what I'm. It is not fair to judge someone just in short time without knowing him/her (especially me indeed).

I'm don't understand for what they what. Is it means that if I'm Penangites I have to act that I'm the person who born in Penang? Pretty sure that it is suppose not to be like that. So please, not bothering to deliver orders or being resentful just because you don’t bother to explore your own ‘country’ are petty excuses to make me feel unwelcome.

It is never funny when people say something about "Penang go home !" or intend to treat me as a foreigners or what so ever they called it. It is a shameful to see our own blood of melayu 'kita' say the bad things to other malays. It is not about racist, but it is disrespectful attitudes for Malaysia people treats to other Malaysian. The truth is, we are not the same blood. We have to admit it. But we are brothers. Band of brothers that Islam always say in holy Quran.

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I’ve spoken to many people in the past 24 hours, analyzing very limited options that I have. Jess and Ain think that the best way for me is go ahead with my argument - to challenge my ideas and go away to my comfort zone in terms of my work and my career.

Chances always in front of me, it is me myself need to play a big roll in my life. It is only a risk as my big barrier. It is not that I can’t do the job, it is where I’m supposed to be when I do it.

Since that last few weeks, I was contemplating life as a bum. Now I have to prepare myself for another topsy turvy journey.


I am dreading the weekend papers…